By mom2arielle

I Am Back Again And Have Decided I Am Going To Do It This Time

Hi everyone it is me again. Quitting again and for good this time. I am not sure if I am going to try for the gift card this time or not since that was part of the excuse that I gave myself when I give in last time was that I missed a day so I might as well smoke and start over again so that I can get my gift card. Stupid right but that is what the addiction was telling me. I know it was just an excuse and not a very good one at that but I did go back to smoking none the less. I tried a few methods in between the last time I was on here and now but I only did them half heartedly but I am giving this quit that I have now my all. I am currently 1 hour into day 2 and on the patch as that seemed to help me most out of all that I tried. I did try an app on my phone that helped you cut down on your cigs by giving you a notification when you could smoke but that only lasted for a day or 2 then I still smoked whenever I wanted to plus when the timer when off I think I finally hit bottom when I went from smoking a pack and a half of cigs a day to over 2 packs a day while trying to cut down. And I felt so bad when I was smoking that much, constant headache, trouble breathing, heart racing, tiredness, acid reflux getting out of hand just to name a few things so finally on april fools day around 11:30 as I was just finishing up the first pack of the day and felt like I was in a cronic state of my panic disorder I just said enough is enough I am not going to be able to cut down either I have to just bite the bullet and quit or I am going to die. And the rest is history. I still have patches from my previous attempts at quitting so I put one on and did not go buy any more cigs. I even worked last night and the bar smoke did not even bother me of course my lungs and head still hurt and I am not sure if I could even really smell it last night we will just have to see what tonight brings.
Cutting down really does not work. You made the right choice by just quitting. I think we have all tried to cut down here at some point before quitting. I am pretty sure it never really worked for anyone - unless it is a cut down before a set quit date.
Thanks for sharing and welcome back :) You can do this we are here for you
Congrats on the new quit! Stay strong you can do this
Its great that you have started a new quit again so soon. Just goes to show how determined you are! You got this! Stay strong and post often!
Welcome Back Mom....and thank you for not quitting to quit...Strongs !!
Welcome back! Your here just move forward and don't be too hard on yourself for the relapse, we have all been there and Ive often don't the 2 pack a day thing in the past. My motto now is never quit trying to quit thats when the smokes have won! Its such a struggle we all know that here. Good luck you can do it :)