By mom2arielle

Hell Week Is Over Onward March

So hell week is officially over and I am onto heck week. I cant believe that in just one week I would have smoked over 200 cigs. That is just crazy. I do feel better breathing wise but my head feels like it is cloudy. I forget a lot of stuff too. I hope this is just temporary. I did find the energy to get off of the couch today and cleaned my kitchen, bathroom, and diningroom and wash a load of laundry but that was about it. I do not want to use all of my energy up before I have to go to work. I work the next 5 nights but thankfully no big parties (that I am aware of they do spring them on me from time to time) so that means that I will have limited reason to go to the bar. Other than getting my customers drinks from there I should not have to go at all. Of course you can still smell it when you walk into the kitchen but since we have a buffet tonight maybe I wont have to go into the kitchen as much either other than to take the dirty dishes back because the smoke smell still makes me crave really bad. I will of course bring my peppermint gum and mints (because I am out of candy canes.) and will have ice chips while I am there. I got a short nap in today too so I hope it is sufficient for the whole night but I don’t know I am tired again already. Me and caffeine so not get alone so well because of my anxiety disorder so I will just have to cope with being tired. I am also hoping that I will be busy tonight not just because I make more money that way but because I have less time to think about smoking. Still one of the hardest times for me as far as cravings go is when I get into my car after work. It is like my brain is like ok you worked really hard tonight so why not celebrate your hard work with a cig. You know you want one it will help you relax so you can go to bed when you get home. Of course I tell my brain no we do not smoke anymore so you are just going to have to figure something else out to relax before you get home usually I just turn on the radio and sing as loud as I can.
out of candy canes!? we need to get this lady her candy prescription stat!
congratulations! that is a huge step!
i know how difficult this first week has been for you! congratulations!
congrats! now its time for "heck week"
AWESOME! The hardest part is behind you, its still going to be tough so don't let your guard down. Just think of it like you are ill, time is the only thing to heal you. And it will heal you.