By mom2arielle

Slipped Up But Back On Track

Ok so I am still super weak at the will power thing. My husbands band came over last night for a jam session before their next gig. I usually hang out in the bedroom upstairs because it is not as loud up there. While I was just hanging out and everything was going great I started to smell cig smoke my husband was letting his band members smoke in the house. I am surprised at how far the cig. Smoke traveled though I always thought that when I smoked it mostly just stayed in the room I was smoking in but no you can smell it all through the house wow that is crazy cause I have a 2 story house and I was in the very last bedroom away from where they were playing. But the smell made me want to smoke soooo bad. I had cravings for hours after they had left. I came downstairs after they had left and it smelt like cigs. Really bad in the room that I usually sit in and play on the computer. They always leave trash around too which grates my nerves there is a trash can right there for petes sake throw you empty stuff in there I am not your wife and I am not your momma well anyway I was throwing their stuff away and the drummer had left a whole pack of smokes with his trash OMG I could not handle the pressure and smoked one even though they were menthol and I did not smoke menthol. I realized a few things as I took a couple of drags off of that cig before I put it out. One that as an addict if I don’t restrain myself I will smoke anything that I never even liked menthol but it tasted just fine last night. 2 it would be so easy to pick up where I left off and  3. I still have a long long long way to go to overcome this addiction. I did not reset my account this time because it was only a couple of puffs (versus the 177 I have not smoked.) after the 3rd puff I asked myself what the heck am I doing and ran it under the water in the sink. I then gave the rest of the pack to my husband and told him to give them back to his drummer and to not let his bandmates smoke in the house anymore please. 
Your right about the addict thing thats how I feel!! you hear those people that keep the last smoke as a reminder?? not me it would be smoked. Good for you not having the whole thing and giving them back! Its hard when it around you.
thanks for the honesty.
oh dear :( never mind, just keep going forward. You have had a lucky escape this time
no smoking in the house is certainly a rule you should enforce!